Releasing the star back into the dark
by Faith in yourself
Summary: Future Fic
1. Immersing in the ocean

AarSon – Releasing the star back into the dark 

Chapter 1 – Immersing in the ocean

July 2011

"This is the end, of you and me, we had a good run...now I'm setting you free".

Like a bird, released into the sky, it's time to fly.

The months spent together – 13, the superstitious unlucky number, never more proven until tonight.

The date, the 4th of July, signifying freedom, releasing the star back into the dark.

His words, left to echo, corrupting the air that surrounded them, hitting the walls of their apartment, hanging in the moment.

He struggled to digest his words, the swallowing of knives, his heart, left as cold as ice...before shattering into a million pieces.

For the man that he once knew, had turned his back, the man who once loved him...had sold him out.

The voice continued.

"We were never inevitable, our forever, was only ever going to be for a while".

Shock saturated his system, poison coursed through his veins, his whispering tone killing him delicately.

His mind began to race, searching desperately for a sign of resistance in what he had just heard, in his stance, in his face. Did he really mean those dirty words he had just said, did he mean them, did he now?

He began wishing to take it back, to where it all went wrong, but the truth was, he did not know where that was.

He was stunned, numb, just staring at him. Until the feeling took his breath away, the feeling indescribable, he looked at him, at the face of his ray of light, fading, concluding, dissolving into acid shade.

He found his voice underneath the pain that was now boiling through his soul, setting him on fire...burning and perishing him alone.

"No, no please, please. Please don't do this, please don't do this Jay".

...There was no response. Jackson stood, motionless.

The men held each other's gaze.

Aaron let his tears run free, his pain within the water.

For he knew, he was staring into the eyes that did not belong, he was staring into the eyes of a stranger, the warmth in them, corrupted, the eyes now lifeless.

Aaron fell back, his body crashing into the wall behind him.

Closing his eyes, he was abducted, into lonely darkness.

Living without him, would be like living in a world with no air, a lifeless body, roaming this world alone.

Nothing mattered but Jackson, everything that mattered was Jackson.

Remembering when, he was the boat, and Jackson the sea, together they would soar, so effortlessly, against the waves, against the world. And now, he was sailing away, alone, into a grey sky morning.

God, he couldn't think of a time, when he felt less alive.

"Aaron?"

He tried so desperately not to listen, but his voice, calling his name. He would travel to the end of the world for him, retrieve the stars, the moon in his honour.

But now the sky was empty, no day, no light... Just night, dark.

Aaron opened his eyes.

Jackson remained unchanged, his position, expression, motionless.

Aaron, his tears turning his eyes scarlet, his stare falling to the floor, but his heart kept falling further.

Aaron could not understand, why the man he loved, the only man he could ever love, was swimming with the sharks.

Aaron began to speak, whispering, desperately trying to iron the flaws that threatened his existence.

"I'm so sorry."

"What for?"

"Whatever I've done wrong, I won't do it again, I promise".

"How can you not do it again if you don't know what it is?" Jackson joked, but it failed to reach his dark eyes. He continued.

"You haven't done anything wrong."

"Is this, is this because of that guy at the bar, I wasn't interested Jackson I swear, I told him I was with someone, he just wouldn't take no for an answer, I should have told him where to go straight away, I just thought he would get the hint. I'm sorry".

Jackson waited until Aaron met his gaze before responding.

"He wasn't the first guy, and he won't be the last to flirt with ya, I over reacted about the situation, If anybody should apologise it should be me. But we can't be together Aaron".

Aaron slowly furrowed his brow in confusion in the digestion of what he had just heard, had he spotted a ray of hope in Jackson's last words?

"What do you mean, 'we can't', why can't we be together?"

Jackson rephrased.

"I mean, I don't want to be with you anymore".

"But you just..."

Jackson cut him off.

"AARON I DONT LOVE YOU ANYMORE!" Jackson shouted, before turning his back on him... Just like everyone else.

For Jackson, was no longer afraid, of open water, he was now, swimming, immersing himself, with the sharks.

Aaron, unable to speak, unable to move. The pain gaining momentum with his every breath, spreading like wild fire through his body, all that he could do, was to immerse himself in the agony, as it savaged beneath his skin and constricted his soul.

Aaron was struck, right through the heart, wearing no armour, with no defences, no weapons to strike back. Danger, destruction, following him everywhere he went, ready to target him at any given moment, choosing tonight as its platform.

Silence fell upon the room.

Aaron pleaded for a higher power, to make him feel no more. He turned around, resting his head against the wall.

Memories was all he had now, his lover, from out of space, the only one who made sense and understood their world.

Aaron began to remember, clinging to their time in the sun. His birthday that he celebrated with Jackson. The builder whisked him away on a surprise four day holiday in Italy. Making love in a secluded spot beneath the stars, candlelit dinners for two, no expense spared. Their first Christmas together, moving into their apartment, recollections swirled together, taking control of his mind.

Tears gently trickled down his face, as he recalled the star filled sky, the night Jackson had told him he loved him, setting the world alight, colours dancing through the galaxy.

And now, their life together eclipsed, an asteroid crashing into their private space.

Aaron struggled to breath, the realisation beginning to become real, his life with Jackson, was only ever going to be borrowed, eventually he would have to return his lucky star, into the dark.

Aaron was the first to break the silent atmosphere, still resting his head against the wall, his voice, just detectible.

"I was always going to have to let you go, wasn't I?"

Jackson, gazing out of the window, not turning to look at him, responded.

"What"?

"It's true what they say, if you love someone, you should, set them free, even if it isn't what you want. I should have figured that one out long ago. I'll go. Ano, this is a long shot but, if you, ever change ya mind...I will be waiting. I would come back in a heartbeat. But, someone like you, could never love someone like me forever, your perfect Jackson...Incredible. Don't let anybody tell you any differently ok?"

Aaron, lifting himself from the wall, trying desperately to support his heavy heart on his own, made his way towards the door.

"I love you Jackson, suppose I always will. Don't worry about me, I'll be fine.

Aaron tried desperately not to let his tears drown his voice, but failed.

"When you find, that someone special, he will be the luckiest guy in the world. You deserve to be happy Jackson, so much. You don't deserve to be with someone, who is damaged goods, like me...take care Jay".

Aaron disappeared silently out of the door.

Aaron's words lingered in the air, surrounding Jackson, but his words, were not warm enough, to keep away the cold.

Jackson turned around, staring at the door. Tears, seeping down his face, drowning his heart.

Jackson moved erratically for the door, for he could not let Aaron go, not like this.

TBC


	2. A million miles of blurring perfection

Chapter 2 – A million miles of blurring perfection

Aaron slowly walked away, down the stairs and into the hallway of the building where his apartment was situated. The building was empty, the other apartments yet to be occupied. Aaron stood still, staring at the door. The very door he was lent against, all those months ago, to hold him up from the heartfelt words Jackson had spoken, that stunned his mind, warmed his heart and lightened his soul.

Replaying the words in his head, and feeling how he felt, in that exact moment.

"_I love you Aaron, I will love you for life."_

Tears gently seeped around his mouth, Aaron was smiling, but dying, holding onto the memory, holding onto the vanishing light.

Jackson made his way out of his apartment, running down the stairs. He saw him, curled up on the floor, leaning against the door,

He stared, he stared at him for minutes, just staring.

Aaron lifted his gaze from the floor, noticing Jackson for the first time. Jackson moved, his face, seething with rage, coming to stand over Aaron.

"HAVENT YOU LEARNT ANYTHING AARON? DONT YOU EVER, EVER SAY THAT AGAIN! YOU ARE NOT DAMAGED! ...YOU HAVE NEVER BEEN DAMAGED GOODS!"

Jackson was trembling, shaking with rage, he continued to stare Aaron down.

Aaron looked towards the floor. Gazing at his tear stained hands. Before opening his heart, pouring his soul onto the ground, the man he is, now was, dissolving on the floor. His voice, barely a whisper.

"You said, you would love me for life".

Jackson, Anger evaporating into the atmosphere, stepped back a few feet away from him, looking at the little lost boy before him, he turned his back to him, before speaking.

"Aaron I, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry".

And he truly was.

Aaron sobbed, his tears, running down his face, rubbing salt into his wounds, releasing soft delicate murmurs from his pain.

Upon hearing him, Jackson closed his eyes, and began to break. His soul splitting his world in two, the tears he tried so desperately to restrain, were set free.

The malice he had forced around his heart, crumbled, taken way.

For he, was swimming away, from the sharks of the ocean.

Of all the things Aaron could have said, he goes and says something, that just knocks Jackson dead, "_You said, you would love you for life". _The words, suffocating Jackson, his breathing, irregular.

But he has to remain strong, but his resolve is loosening, slipping away from his grasp.

He holds onto the wall before him, looking at the wall, searching for the writing to help him, to give him clarity.

He doesn't think, he just speaks. Not moving from his position, tears streaming down his cheeks.

"How many people last forever with their first love? It doesn't happen Aaron, you will want to experience life with other men at some point!"

Aaron, his words settling into his system, moves from the floor, now leaning against the door. Confusion clouding his thought process.

"What?"

His question goes unanswered.

Aaron, his mind racing, trying to put the pieces together quickly.

Suddenly, it hits him. Jackson, the sensible one, able to soothe Aaron's ghosts away, the man with all the answers. Now, eaten alive by insecurities, mirroring his own reflection, Aaron and Jackson...are now, the same person.

The panic stricken teenager, willing himself to speak, but having no idea how to handle this situation.

"You think I'm gonna leave ya, and, be with someone else?"

Jackson, still staring at the wall, did not answer.

Aaron, could not see the tears he was crying, spoke again, frustration evident in his tone.

"It's not fair, that you think that I will stray, because you think it inevitable because you're the only man I have ever been with, that I need to play the field and sleep around...WELL YOU DONT KNOW ME VERY WELL DO YA! He screamed, screaming in sheer desperation.

Jackson, turned to face him. Jackson's face, tarnished with tears, blurring his perfection. Looking into soft, broken blue eyes, speaking, from the heart.

"I know you think I'm perfect, I try, I try so hard I really try to be for you, but I'm not. Being with someone else will make you realise I am not."

Aaron tried to protest but Jackson spoke quickly before him.

"You're strong now Aaron, you only needed me, for a while, just until you were ready to face the world on your own, and you are now".

Tears corrupted Aaron's vision, Jackson's words, just words.

Jackson, looking towards the floor, tears running furiously, dropping to the ground, stars, deliberately taken from the night, crashing to the earth. No light, no sound, nothing, there's nothing left.

"I have to let you go Aaron, I have to set you free".

They both stood there, the temperature, cold, numbness constricting around their core. The floor, splitting their world, separating them, millions of miles apart.

Their tears, flowing into the night.

The silence lasted a life time, before Jackson looked up, viewing the lifeless soul in front of him, forcing a small smile to his lips, before speaking.

"You won't love me forever Aaron, you will move on, I'm".

Jackson, caught, choking on his words, once again staring towards the floor.

"I'm nothing special, I'm, nothing ".

Aaron, digested his words. Before, the anger, built up inside of him. Losing his head, his sense of rationality, he stared at the man before him, breathing in all the essences of his soul mate, breathing in his sole purpose for life. Before speaking, fast and furiously, not stopping for air, the wonders of Jackson.

TBC


	3. The Traffic Light

Chapter 3 – The Traffic Light...

Aaron, digested his words. Before, the anger, built up inside of him. Losing his head, his sense of rationality, he stared at the man before him, breathing in all the essences of his soul mate, breathing in his sole purpose for life. Before speaking, fast and furiously, not stopping for air, the wonders of Jackson.

"Don't say that, DONT YOU EVER SAY THAT...YOU'RE SPECIAL TO ME! You're my reason for life. You're all I think about, I wake up and, and your first thing on my mind, I close my eyes, you're all I see, I can't sleep unless I'm picturing your face. I look across and watch you sleeping, and, I can't believe your mine. Words can't describe, what you do to me.

I love the way you never hold back, all the incredible things you say. Remember when you said how I close the door, close my eyes, I'm only closing myself off, and when I hold my breath, hold my tongue, I'm only holding myself back. The best days of my life are yet to come, and it's ok, it's alright, to open up. I don't owe anybody anything, my life is mine to live anyway I please, there are no promises left for me to keep, I can be whoever I want to be, no apologies.

I remember it word for word.

I Love it when, you forget your key and you knock on the door, hands in your pockets, beaming the smile that takes my breath away, every single time.

And I love how often you wear your red shirt, simply because, you know it's my favourite, you wear it, just for me.

I love it when you think out loud, the things you say when, you think on one else is around.

The way you whisper my name sometimes, when you sleep.

Your hands, touching me, your grasp, so soft, but with an underlying meaning, telling me, you will never let go.

I love the way you wrap your arms around me, feeling you need to protect me from the bad, never releasing me until you know 100% that I feel safe.

I love, your god awful humour, that no one understands, except me.

And most of all, most of all, I love your eyes, big open brown eyes, the keys to your soul, falling upon my face, gazing into my eyes. Jay it's, it's magic, electricity charging through my body, bringing me to life.

Sex with you, making love with you is, I can't describe the feeling it's ...it's spellbinding.

But, it's just the icing on the cake. I would give it up...If it means you will never stop looking at me, never stop the sideway glances you steal, when you think I'm not looking, making me feel like the most important thing in the world.

There you have it, all the wonders, all the wonders you hold.

Jay, I could search forever, but I swear, there is no one in this world like you. Your one of a kind!

And, out of everything you said, all I want to hear you say is, come back, come back to me.

I will never, break your heart...Please, please don't break mine.

Please, don't make me look into your eyes tonight... For the last time".

Aaron, broke, falling back to be caught against the wall. Closing his eyes, as they started to rain, all hope, washing away, tears seeping through, releasing low moans, of shattered glass.

There was no more he could do, no more could be done.

Was everything made, to be broken?

Jackson, the breath taken from him, blown away. Aaron's words, _the wonders of Jackson, _exacerbating his guilt, but smoothing out his flaws. His resolve, evaporating from around his heart.

Aaron, opened his eyes, Jackson, was standing just inches away from him. Taking Aaron in his arms before the teenager could think, kissing him.

Healing the hole in his heart, their pieces, coming together, uniting once again, but this time, stronger, indestructible.

The kiss lasted a life time, but their embrace, lasted an eternity. Jackson holding him, in his arms, his hands, never letting go.

Aaron, back to comfort...Back to Jackson.

But both men, were mourning the loss of losing touch that lasted mere minutes, that felt like a million years.

Jackson was the first to break the comforting silence, wiping the tears away from Aaron's eyes.

"I will never do this again, I will never hurt you again, I'll protect you with my life, I promise."

"I thought I lost you".

"I'm so sorry Aaron. I just had to give you a chance, I thought, I had to set you free. But, in truth, I was fooling myself. I would have come crawling back, cause, I could never let you go Aaron, I would rather die, than be without you".

"Me to". The teenager whispered, "But, we don't know the future Jay, we can't promise each other forever".

"Ano".

"Our forever is now".

"And that's what we will focus on".

Their forever, for an undetermined time, sealed with a soft, gentle kiss.

The traffic light, turning the good intentions to green, creating the cross mark to pave the way, for both men, to say what they mean to say, through just one kiss.

Jackson reluctantly was the one to end their embrace, looking Aaron directly in the eye before speaking.

"You know, I thought It would take me forever, to convince you I didn't love you anymore, but, you just accepted it, no questions. What happened to make you lose faith in me? I tell you I love you every single day".

Aaron fell under the intense gaze of his lover, dropping his eyes to the floor.

"Because, you're too good for me Jay. I just thought you came to your senses. My heart would be permanently broken without you. But, I would have understood you know, if ya walked away.

Aaron's eyes, raining, dripping to the end of his face, onto the floor.

Jackson was fuming. Seething with anger, but kept it in control. Instead, taking him into his arms, instantly calming himself.

"Aaron I. I swear to you, with every fibre of my body, I will make you see, just how worth it you truly are. God can take away everything I own, everyone I love, just as long as he doesn't take you. You're my light, my sun. My heart is in your hands, you control me, I'm all yours. For you, I would risk it all, I would give my life for you".

They stayed wrapped in each other's arms, keeping away the cold, possessing everything that was the other. The aliens, the stars.

For Jackson's body, did not belong to him anymore, it belonged to Aaron, he was Aaron, and Aaron was Jackson.

They were, the closest to heaven, they will ever be.

Both men, taking comfort, in no sound, surrounding all around them now.

"God Jackson, I need you so much".

Jackson, simply whispered delicately, into his ear, the things that made Aaron feel, what he wanted to feel.

"You've got me, I'm yours...And I will love you for life".

The End

Sorry it's another short story.

Hope you enjoyed it, let me know...review.


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